Sorry but you've gotten fatter, no surgery for you - ThinnerTimes

pgh3rivers · 03-06-2008, 10:37 PM

The following is my original post:

SO this is my problem. I have gained weight during the 6 months of nutirtional classes.The weight management center told me today they won't even submit me to the insurance company unless I can lose 10 pounds because I will be turned down. I started at 247 and am now weigh 262. Has anyone else had this happen? I can't believe 15 pounds will keep me from having surgery.

I feel rotten about this!

That was my original post. It has caused a $#i! storm. After several responses from other users I removed my post. I felt that several people who responded were not sensitive to the specific problem that I was struggling with and I was not comfortable with my original post being available for all readers. Because of the high amount of people who messaged me privately because they too has struggled with gaining weight before surgery, I felt it was important that I repost the original question.

When I posted my original question, I wanted to connect with other's who were struggling with weight gain during the 6 months of supervised diet. I was NOT looking for comments from people who did not know why or how I had gained weight. To make it clear to everyone I did diet and exercise. I gained weight following the program. You can say that's bull but prior to entering the 6 m of supervised diet and nutrition I was taking meridia and orlistat. I was fat, my blood pressure was sky high and I had been on a low calorie diet for months. I decided to follow the program and I gained weight on it right away.

To be clear- I did not remove the original post because I am sensitive. I was FURIOUS more than anything. I was furious that I had other people message me privately because they felt they could not truthfully post because they did not want to be bullied, judged, or belittled by other members.

I was furious that I was followed from board to board by some people. I removed my post and stopped posting to prevent myself from saying something nasty and hurtful to some of the people who had responded to my post.

In my opinion being honest and being a self declared bitch are two very different things. I don't have to become accustom to anything on this forum. I will not accept that it is ever appropriate to speak to people without respect. I am going to try my hardest to be cautious, truthful, caring, and supportive whenever I possibly can on this forum.

What I have learned from all of this is how to block some users. I highly suggest learning how to use this function. We are all very different people. Despite all having WLS (or thinking about it) our paths to surgery and after will not be the same. I expect to find many people that I relate to and connect with on this forum. I don't expect to connect with everyone. I am so glad I learned to block users, because now I don't have to deal with them. I believe that is a loss to them. I have a lot to offer others who respect me, ask questions, and don't jump to negative uneducated conclusions about me.

This is a forum for support. People should lighten up and be sensitive to others no matter where they are in the journey.

Update**** I did lose the weight required before surgery. I stopped following the nutritionists advice and dieted with an extremely low calorie diet and exercised until I couldn't move. I exercised between 4-8 hours a day and did not work during that time. I did not eat days before my weight in or drink water before. I do not suggest anyone follow what I had to do to make my weight. After being weighed I gained almost 10 pounds back immediately. My insurance has approved surgery and I am scheduled for May 28, 2008.

jerseygrl684 · 03-07-2008, 04:02 AM

im going to be very harsh.... if you cannot handle 10 lbs PRE OP.. you are in for a rude awakening.

I never understood doctors that wanted like 20-40 lbs, but 10 lbs is NOTHING.

They want to see that you can lose a minimal amount before, because you know what, after surgery.. yes you are going to lose weight... but you are also going to hit a point where you can gain it alllll back.. and it worries me that you cant even buckle down and drop 10 lbs.

VanessaSFL · 03-07-2008, 04:46 AM

I have heard that from others.I in fact was told once I got my surgery date that I could not gain an ounce.I had 45 days.They weighed me the morning of surgery, I had only lost 4 lbs , but my Dr. was not playing.

I disagree with Kelly, I think that any weight loss is hard.Even 10 lbs.Buckled down or not

This feels like a set back now , and it is.You can do it and please come here for support.There is even a thread on the forum about "losing the last 20 pounds"

Good Luck....And you CAN do this.

fisher1000 · 03-07-2008, 05:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pgh3rivers

SO this is my problem. I have gained weight during the 6 months of nutirtional classes.The weight management center told me today they won't even submit me to the insurance company unless I can lose 10 pounds because I will be turned down. I started at 247 and am now weigh 262. Has anyone else had this happen? I can't believe 15 pounds will keep me from having surgery.

I feel rotten about this!

First of all, you can't keep the negative thoughts...they are more detrimental to you than the food you're eating.

Next, please understand that losing the weight before you have the surgery is about your safety more than it is about commitment to weight loss. It's also a trick the insurance company is using to see if you can be successful losing weight on your own and thus perhaps not need the expense of the surgery. Granted, being committed is important, but we're food addicts, and commitment is difficult.

When you lose weight, it shrinks your liver and gives the doctor a little more room to operate, making the operation safer for you and easier for the doctor to do well.

Others on this board have stories of gaining weight during their supervised diet, but face the facts...you are addicted to food like every one of us on here. Losing the weight on your own is difficult, but you must remember that every bite of food at this stage is a "life decision" verses a decision of the moment. What you do in this brief time before your surgery will have an affect on you for the rest of your life.

Please do yourself a favor and try once more. Think positive thoughts, think of things you can do besides eat, try to replace a meal or two with a protein shake or slim fast, and try to start exercising in some way 2-3 times a week. You will need to be in these habits anyway after the surgery, so it's never to early to start.

Also remember that after the surgery, your pouch will be just a tool to help you lose weight, but it alone can't and won't do it for you. There will still be some discipline involved. In fact, the surgery itself will be the easy part. The hard part will be undoing bad habits that you've created over your lifetime, and creating new habits to keep you successful for the rest of your life.

Don't be down...we've all been there in some form or another and that's why we are here--for support when we need to be supported.

Believe that you can do this, believe that you are WORTHY, believe that you deserve to have the life you want. If you believe those things, really believe them in your soul, then you will lose the weight you need to lose, and have the surgery you need to have, and be the person you want to be.

I BELIEVE YOU CAN DO IT!

Good Luck!

-Mike

VTMoondog · 03-07-2008, 06:47 AM

I'm with Kelly on this one.
ANyone who is here and serious about going thru this VERY serious surgery, has to really make up their mind (I strongly suggest regular visits to the psychologist) to make it work, and that includes being serious enough about it to try like hell to lose weight before surgery...that is the whole point, isnt it?
To gain weight prior to surgery tells me that you may not be following your NUT's advice and keeping to a restricted caloric intake....and not exersizing.

Surgery isnt the magic pill. YOu need to do your share of the work. Trust me, its not easy. I dont have a date yet, and i've been in the gym 5-6 days a week since oct. 1, working out like a banshee. It's just what you have to do.
-s-

Amandazon247 · 03-07-2008, 06:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fisher1000

First of all, you can't keep the negative thoughts...they are more detrimental to you than the food you're eating.

Next, please understand that losing the weight before you have the surgery is about your safety more than it is about commitment to weight loss. It's also a trick the insurance company is using to see if you can be successful losing weight on your own and thus perhaps not need the expense of the surgery. Granted, being committed is important, but we're food addicts, and commitment is difficult.

When you lose weight, it shrinks your liver and gives the doctor a little more room to operate, making the operation safer for you and easier for the doctor to do well.

Others on this board have stories of gaining weight during their supervised diet, but face the facts...you are addicted to food like every one of us on here. Losing the weight on your own is difficult, but you must remember that every bite of food at this stage is a "life decision" verses a decision of the moment. What you do in this brief time before your surgery will have an affect on you for the rest of your life.

Please do yourself a favor and try once more. Think positive thoughts, think of things you can do besides eat, try to replace a meal or two with a protein shake or slim fast, and try to start exercising in some way 2-3 times a week. You will need to be in these habits anyway after the surgery, so it's never to early to start.

Also remember that after the surgery, your pouch will be just a tool to help you lose weight, but it alone can't and won't do it for you. There will still be some discipline involved. In fact, the surgery itself will be the easy part. The hard part will be undoing bad habits that you've created over your lifetime, and creating new habits to keep you successful for the rest of your life.

Don't be down...we've all been there in some form or another and that's why we are here--for support when we need to be supported.

Believe that you can do this, believe that you are WORTHY, believe that you deserve to have the life you want. If you believe those things, really believe them in your soul, then you will lose the weight you need to lose, and have the surgery you need to have, and be the person you want to be.

I BELIEVE YOU CAN DO IT!

Good Luck!

-Mike

This is excellent advice and I agree 100% ... just decide and you will make it.. heck 10 pounds is water weight girl... focus and loss it for your 6th month check up..... you can do it.... thats a 10 minute walk a day and cut back on salt.......

Claire-in-Texas · 03-07-2008, 07:03 AM

I have to agree with Kelly, since I am at the point NOW where, if it weren't for my pre-op focus, and what I learned about myself, I would be in BIG trouble. It is a necessary part of the process (IMHO).

I also agree with Mike. You can do this. I know you can. And it DOEs take focus. And it takes will. But that is what it will take later, after the honeymoon period, when hunger returns.

The very best of luck to you. Today is a new day, turn the page!

kellyMASS · 03-07-2008, 09:01 AM

I did the Same thing.It took me three months to lose 20 pounds.My nutritionist sat me down and said"Kelly,your life is too good.Most people come here when they truly hit rock bottom.You are just not miserable enough to lose this weight and have this surgery."I didnt know what to think about that.Yes I do have a pretty good life.I have a daughter and hubby who love me.I still dont know exactly what was up with that comment but for some reason something clicked.The next day I woke up and went to the gym.Now if you are really serious about surgery something will go off in your brain too.Maybe you just arent ready.Everyone gets prepped in their own way and at a pace that is good for them.Dont get down on yourself that will only make you eat more and feel worse and eat more.If you really want this you will do it.IF YOU NEED TO TALK PM ME!!!

VTMoondog · 03-07-2008, 09:28 AM

Again...Kelly has hit it on the head....a point I neglected to mention, and that is, there has to be a point where it "just clicks" in your head ( after much internal and professional discussion in my case) and you are mentally ready to take on not only the prospect of surgery, but more importantly, the behavioral changes and inclusion of exercise in your life that will be the KEY to your future.
I hope your "click" comes soon

peace,

-s-

VanessaSFL · 03-07-2008, 09:58 AM

I think I disagreed with Kelly's delivery...IMO.

Agreed that change & commitment must happen.