SURVIVORS

Hello fellow SURVIVORS!

I have overcome those events many, many years ago... but they do leave telltale scars...

I posted a thread about an event I experienced over two days at my new job - old wounds may have healed, but they are still evident... Now I'm feeling quite OK and at peace!
http://www.thinnertimesforum.com/car...ld-you-do.html
Cheers,
Vim

thank you all for starting this group. I have a lot of issues as well. I am just starting my process for the surgery and have to do a 6 month diet before the insurance will approve it. I was hoping that during this time I can deal with some of the issues I'm going to face once I start unzipping this fat suit that I have used for protection since I was a kid. I am very worried about feeling vulnerable again. I also engaged in a lot of very destructive behavior as a teenager and I'm worried about doing that stuff again too if I don't have food to protect/sedate myself with.
It's good to know there are others who are willing to share their experiences and provide insight into what we will go through.
take care,
Lori

I do my best to keep myself very REAL here while at the same time trying to protect my identity, so I completely understand your need fire.

Vim, your help on this is appreciated, your PMs helped a lot and I think I've fixed it. To some degree. I'd imagine I'm not the only one that has a need (due to professional reasons) to not have their identity obvious here. I just added some pics, and maybe they need to go...Thanks again Vim.

Phoenix,
Anybody who logs into TTF and then selects "Groups" then "Survivors" will be able to read these posts.
I suppose Visitors can also read - but cannot post replies until they register. Hope this helps.
As with all public spaces, keep your anonymity!
Cheers,
Vim

I'm wondering if this is accessible for reading by anyone? Or is it only people who are on that list above of members?

Hello gorgeous gals!

Hej Princess!
Just recognising the wave of emotions is big time stuff!
We become very capable to slink into and out of guilt as it suits us, but indeed, when death faces, we're at the base of the wall.
I think that, reading between the lines, many of us have had lifelong battles with our mothers, often domineering or insecure women. I have had one of those and my mother died exactly a year ago in Stockholm. There is a lot of "blame" towards her and for once, thanks to her death, she is not able to "answer back" and break my wings - I am able to learn to fly for a change! Aged 50!!! My mother has been the source of much criticism of my handling of my abusers which has really not helped. But, do you know, it gets better each day... Small steps soon add up! I've been walking for a long time now and at last am getting somewhere!
As Lisa writes, the mere fact that we post in this group is because we are SURVIVORS - no matter what from and indeed, nobody has any better or worse story - each is relative to the individual.
Anger is part of death. And December is still very recent. Best wishes in your healing.
Cheers,
Vim

Hey Lisa...
I know. Trust me, I know. But I can't help but feel "guilty" because the others here have been thru such a rotten load of crap when I look at my life.
My dad died in Dec., 1 day after his 68th birthday. I live in Denmark, my parents live in Tombstone, Az. I couldn't make it home for his funeral, nor did I get home while he was in the hospital. I am wracked with guilt. He said to me on the phone (after I had lost ca. 100lbs/45kg) "we're not gonna be able to recognize you..." To tell you the truth, I don't know if having surgery would have changed any of the crappy guilt I feel for not getting home...Plus, I feel guilty because if I hadn't been raised with physical & emotional abuse, maybe I wouldn't have chosen the men in my life I've been with. So I blame my dad in many ways for that...Even tho I've sort of managed to get over that & confronted him many years ago about the "discipline" in our house, I still feel like a shit for being angry at him...And now he's dead....

I'm not ready to talk about this yet, but I'm here girls. I think this particular issue has always been a sore spot for me and it will become one of my hardest struggles as the fat suit melts away. Getting approached by men is why I always put the weight back on after big losses. I think it will be a lifelong struggle for me. I have the most perfect man in the world by my side, but I still get triggered.