Dating - ThinnerTimes

suzanne · 02-02-2007, 01:07 PM

Ok it has been a long time since I posted. I have had all my surgeries, and not to sound self righteous but the men are coming out from everywhere. My question is when do you tell someone about having the surgery, or do you, also in my case it is more noticeable because I have had so much plastic surgery that i have a lot of scars, and if the relationship does get to the intimate level they are going to ask why I have them, so do you or do you not tell someone and when do you tell them and what do you say?

veroniquetalk · 02-03-2007, 07:15 AM

I have only dated one person since my surgery. When I felt comfortable with him, after about 2 weeks, I told him about my wls. Then when it looked like we were going to become intimate I just told him (about a week before hand) that I had lot's of scars and explained why. I also made it very clear that I was sensitive about them and that I was concerned about how he would react. Well, I think I have met the most marvelous man in the world, because when he saw them he kissed them and thanked me for trusting him enough to share this part of me with him.

AlabamaChick · 02-03-2007, 07:40 AM

Awwwww Vernoica!!!! I'm gonna cry! That is so sweet!!!! (sniffle, sniffle) I'm happy for you.

Mavisavis · 02-03-2007, 07:43 AM

I usually tell people almost from the word go.....because I am usually out with another bypass buddy and it usually comes up somehow. I am very upfront and out about my experience. But that is just my personality. I usually show part of my scars when I tell them about it.....you know, like a sample!

lealphachienne · 02-03-2007, 09:58 AM

Hmmm...depends on how well you know them. I'm ating sevra people at he moment. One person I have known from before WLS....so hat's a no brainer. Another is a complete stranger I met and have gotten to go out a dozen times. I told him on the 3rd or 4th date whn it just came up during his teases abou how little I ate. He just said oh...wow and was't curious at all. I have tattoos covering my scars...so...often I am asked why so big? That leads into more converstaion depending on who's aksing. So far, I haven't had any man react negativley to me having had WLS and PS.....men are easy....I think they just want access and are curious if my girls feel as good as they look

Mavisavis · 02-03-2007, 10:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lealphachienne

Hmmm...depends on how well you know them. I'm ating sevra people at he moment. One person I have known from before WLS....so hat's a no brainer. Another is a complete stranger I met and have gotten to go out a dozen times. I told him on the 3rd or 4th date whn it just came up during his teases abou how little I ate. He just said oh...wow and was't curious at all. I have tattoos covering my scars...so...often I am asked why so big? That leads into more converstaion depending on who's aksing. So far, I haven't had any man react negativley to me having had WLS and PS.....men are easy....I think they just want access and are curious if my girls feel as good as they look

I too have not found a guy who cares. They are either respectful and amazed at what I've done, or a little curious, or sometimes just matter of fact. But it hasn't mattered really.

MILA · 02-03-2007, 10:05 AM

If I was single .. it wouldn't matter one bit to me if a woman had undegone WLS. Why the heck should it anyway? If anything, it shows a person had the sense and determination to overcome a problem. IMO any guy who has a problem with it isn't worth spending time with.

veroniquetalk · 02-03-2007, 02:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlabamaChick

Awwwww Vernoica!!!! I'm gonna cry! That is so sweet!!!! (sniffle, sniffle) I'm happy for you.

I spent a lot of years in a very unhappy marriage and feel so blessed to have found out that there is the possibility of finding someone out there who can understand just what you need most of the time. He is one of a kind!

Bypassingme619 · 02-04-2007, 01:33 PM

Suzanne I guess we need to do some catching up. Change your avatar so everyone can see the new sexy you. I am so happy for you sweety. You deserve thee attention and a good man who knows how good of a woman you are.

suzanne · 02-11-2007, 07:34 AM

Thanks everyone, and Dennise there is a new pic for you!!!