Back from plastic surgery and a little sad - ThinnerTimes - Gastric Bypass Forum, Lap Band Forum, and Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy Forum

suzanne · 09-19-2006, 06:30 PM

First I want to say thank you for all the well wishes with my plastic surgery. I had it last wed, and I am at my parents house recouping and I am slowely feeling better. I had a lower body lift, and inner thigh lift, everything seems to be going well, and I go for my dr visit tomorrow to make sure everthing is ok. However, I do have a question for some of you who have already had the surgery. Did you have trouble letting go of someone in your past. Let me explain. My ex and I have been on and off for ten years. Well I kinda have pushed him away this last month, even though I think I still love him, anyway, he called me the day of the surgery and told me he loved me, and then when I got home, I had an email from him saying that he had moved on. I wasn't real upset, I know in my heart that we were not good for each other, but for some reason he is that one part of my past that I just have had the hardest time letting go. When I woke up from my plastic surgery, the next day I cried because I realized I am not that fat girl anymore, and it has been about 15 months since my gastric bypass surgery, and I feel like I don't know who I am, and I think it scares me. Everything else is perfect in my life, I just wish it wasn't so hard for me to let him go, just would like to know if anyone else has experienced this with a loved one, or friend or something. Thanks for all the support I always get.

Blueyz · 09-19-2006, 06:35 PM

Not only does plastic surgery alter your body, it alters your mind. Your mind will catch up to your new self, but it will take time. I was very depressed with my first surgery. It is really hard to explain until you are in the position, but I can relate. You will be ok. Give your body time to heal and stick with us. I am really glad that all went well with your surgery. How do your thighs feel? Do they hurt the most?

rainrain · 09-19-2006, 06:48 PM

I wish I could help you but I am not sure who I am!!

You sure put it down so well, who have we become and where the heck are we going???

I wish I knew, but one thing for sure is that the journey has been quite a ride and while you may feel that the ride is over now that the Plastics are done, I can tell it aint over yet!

So many changes, and maybe that s the way it should be!

Chin up, youv'e been through so much and the best is yet to come!
R

Mavisavis · 09-19-2006, 11:22 PM

Awwww, hang in there. This whole experience is all about change inside and out. I think for some people the outside comes first, then they have to balance the inside. I did most of my inner work first and then had to bring the outside along. It's a very personal journey. One thing I guarantee......when you figure out who you are....you'll find out you are better than you ever realized!

SweetSouthern · 09-20-2006, 06:16 AM

I think everyone has to mourn the loss of a relationship, especially one that lasted for so long. It's a normal process. I went through a divorce after 17 yrs. of marriage and I mourned as if it were a death and I was scared too of letting go. I still loved him also, but knew we were not good for each other any longer. It's a hard thing to go through. It seems a part of you has to die inside so that the other part can go on and live life. I had to come to terms with the fact that it's okay to love someone and just not be able to live with them, so I hoped the best for him. Even though he's a monster to me sometimes now, I would never wish anything bad to happen to him because there is a "certain kind" of love still there for him and his well-being, after all he's my children's dad, BUT not the kind that I used to feel. It will get better for you. It's okay to feel the way you do. Time will help. You just have to be strong and know in your heart your decision was the right one for you. I hope you are doing better with your pre-op recovery and will feel better very soon in your heart as well.