Getting attention as you lose weight... - ThinnerTimes - Gastric Bypass Forum, Lap Band Forum, and Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy Forum

cprnow · 11-04-2005, 08:26 PM

So, I have been at different weights all my life (haven't we all?) I hate being as fat as I am right now, and I've always felt that *fat* is not the real me. BUT...I hate to admit this, a lot of the time, I sorta like that invisible feeling that some of us fat girls have. You know- they look through you, and you don't have to deal with anything.

Just a few months ago, I was under 200 lbs, and I could see that I was getting a few looks. It's sort of uncomfortable. Since then, I have gained 30 lbs. and those same people have gone back into not seeing me.

So my question to you all that have been through this as you get to your goal weight...what do you go through in regard to being seen?

I hope this makes sense, I'm not sure that it's coming out right...

LizardQueen · 11-04-2005, 09:11 PM

It's kinda uncomfortable for me since I was use to my handy dandy big fat invisability sheild! I try to remain low key. I'm not big on attention and the way I look at it is if you didn't bother to get to know me when I was MO, don't bother trying now.

Bypassingme619 · 11-04-2005, 09:33 PM

I so know what you mean because I am so use to being the invisable one. I have grown use to that. Now that I have lost all this weight I have noticed I get more looks and guys even flirt with me more. I so look forward to meeting my goal but not all the attention. I think it is cute because my fiance gets more a kick out of men looking at me then I do. I guess being a big woman has it purkes when you don't want to be noticed. Sometimes people have the tendency to ignore or not make eye contact with a big person, like they will catch the fat germ or something. I am sure in time I will grow into accepting the looks and compliments. I just have to learn and teach my self that they are not looking at me as that bigger girl I was almost 4 months ago but the new me.

lealphachienne · 11-04-2005, 09:51 PM

[QUOTE=cprnow]....So my question to you all that have been through this as you get to your goal weight...what do you go through in regard to being seen? QUOTE]

I strut

Blueyz · 11-04-2005, 11:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cprnow

So, I have been at different weights all my life (haven't we all?) I hate being as fat as I am right now, and I've always felt that *fat* is not the real me. BUT...I hate to admit this, a lot of the time, I sorta like that invisible feeling that some of us fat girls have. You know- they look through you, and you don't have to deal with anything.

Just a few months ago, I was under 200 lbs, and I could see that I was getting a few looks. It's sort of uncomfortable. Since then, I have gained 30 lbs. and those same people have gone back into not seeing me.

So my question to you all that have been through this as you get to your goal weight...what do you go through in regard to being seen?

I hope this makes sense, I'm not sure that it's coming out right...

It is very strange and so obvious that so many more men will hold doors open for me in public. I catch men staring at me and I laugh inside because I will always have a fat girl inside of me. I like to remember how people used to treat me and how it is now.

VanessaSFL · 11-05-2005, 07:13 AM

I went to the Honda dealership yesterday....a few salesmen were outside talking.We (hub and I0 walked up and the men were stairing at my boobs and then I caught them burning a hole on my butt.

I asked mt husband if I had something on my face or my shirt that I had missed....He said ..yeah ..your hot.

I have lost 117 lbs...and my wedding ring does not fit anymore.Hubby wants to get it fixed.....I think the people in our life have to adjust too.

I still feel like the "FAT GIRL" mentally but I will never hide again.!

Van

Mavisavis · 11-05-2005, 10:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bypassingme619

I think it is cute because my fiance gets more a kick out of men looking at me then I do.

I love that he is that comfortable and trusting in your relationship! How cool that he is so happy for you and proud of you.

bridgetgirl · 11-07-2005, 10:20 AM

Another way of looking at things is that you FEEL better and you have more confidence because everyday is bringing new promise.

I felt the stares alot and hated it in the beginning. But now Im comfortable with it all. Like Dale said, the doors are opened more and I like it. Becasue its gentelmanly and a sweet gesture to do that for a lady... and for the first time in a long time I feel just like that, a lady, feminine and soft ( a good kind of soft) !

bridgetgirl · 11-07-2005, 10:20 AM

Although living in San Diego, now that Im thin Im pretty average!

CiCi · 11-07-2005, 10:39 AM

I sometimes feel okay with the attention, and sometimes I don't. I think it's all about WHO the attention is from. If it's from guys I've known, I get a little miffed because they knew me before, so why are they all of the sudden paying attention now?? (They had their chance and blew it.) If they are guys I've never met, then no big deal. I enjoy it for the most part.

But, I definitely know that part of the reason I gained the weight in the first place was to hide... and as a self-imposed punishment. I really had to deal with that part... because I don't want to gain the weight it back. I had to forgive myself for a lot of things and learn that I am worthy enough to be healthy and feel better. This has probably been the toughest part for me - the mental adjustments.