If I hear this one more time..... - Page 3 - ThinnerTimes - Gastric Bypass Forum, Lap Band Forum, and Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy Forum

pawpal · 09-14-2009, 07:37 PM

I think some of these people that talk out of ignorance MUST be related to the same people who originally thought the world was flat. Everyone knows it all - until they're proven wrong. Only you really know what's right for you! Good luck!
Doreen

carrie68 · 09-14-2009, 09:16 PM

I so knew that people would react like that and that is why I told very few people before surgery. This is not a decision that any of us made quickly or easily. I am very fortunate that I have had an awesome support system. I tell people now what I did and now I hear all of the horror stories, people have no idea how/when to filter. My friends father died from having a tooth pulled, does that stop me from going to the dentist? Of course not.

Good luck with everything. You sound like you are happy with your decision. Don't listen to the negative! People love to fear things! We have each other!

pawpal · 09-14-2009, 10:13 PM

Thanks Carrie - I can't say I'm unhappy with my decision - but still waiting to see results (only a week out - had it done 9/08). I have had some family members who intiially were trying to tell me nothing but horror stories beforehand - but after seeing how I've been doing (and hearing more stories of success from others) they've been much more supportive. Good luck to you to!

fyi - my husband's grandfather also died from having a tooth pulled and then getting infected. It's never stopped anyone in his family from continuing to go to the Dentist either. Although I have to admit, so far for me this surgery has been a lot easier than some of my visits to the dentist.

ardita · 09-14-2009, 10:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sherry_Lynn

I very carefully chose who I told before I had it done. Afterwards, many people asked me why didn't I tell them. Here was my reply: "Because I didn't want a bunch of uneducated, uninformed Buffoons giving me their unasked for advice." Shut them up pretty quick.

Too funny-laughing my a** off from that one! Good for you for thinking so quickly!

hihiknez · 09-14-2009, 10:48 PM

I'm sorry you are having to deal with that. Actually, that's exactly why I stopped telling people who I am not really close with. So many people have nothing nice to say but then they turn around and make sly little passive aggressive comments about your weight so F them. This is all about us anyway dammit! So smile girl and do what you need to do. You are getting healthy and that is all that matters! Hang in there!

hihiknez · 09-18-2009, 07:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claire-in-Texas

It was the same thing 2.5 years ago. Therefore, I just didn't say much. And when I heard the rumors and innuendo and downright falsehoods I changed the subject. I wasn't going to get into a pissing contest with people who are and were ill-informed. Don't lower yourself, and don't waste your time and energy on it. It is human nature, and not the best, at that.

When I went in to tell her that the surgery was scheduled and I would be taking some vacation time I told her that I only wanted her and my supervisor to know for now and that anyone else it is up to me when and if they find out- she said alright of course but she asked why out of curiosity- I told her because some people have negative feeling about the choice and I don't want to deal with any negativity until post op and on my own clock- she was like...really? You think some people are against it? I was like well at least it sounds like SHE isnt against it but it seems like common sense to me that some people would be against it, so I was surprised that she wouldn't see that. Especially, my office where I am surrounded by people who don't have this problem! By people who are constantly looking at people up and down and judging them behind their backs- I see it all the time. I am kind of ranting now but I just gotta bring this chick up...she is a supervisor also but not mine thank god...and she has some love handles for sure- she could stand to lose 15 pounds...she is constantly trying to tell people how she really doesn't eat much, no toxins go in this body, blah blah blah. But then 2 minutes later she is eating the hell outta some doritos or whatever. It is weird because everyone is like doesn't she realize how quickly she contradicts her self?! I mean damn could'nt she at least wait til she gets home to eat that crap so she can atleast appear to live up to her claims?!! I mean so many skinny people falsly beleive that us over weight people do exactly that and we are closet eaters and thats why we are fat! She is actually proof of the fact that, no...actually that is not always the case and in fact a lot of us have to eat healthy most of the time just to maintain a weight and if we want to actually lose weight we have to eat much much much less of that healthy food, excercise our *sses off and when they see us eating healthy at work or whatever it is not just a front that is us doing the same damn crap we do when we get home too! Bottom line it just aint fair and that is what has to be understood and accepted and adjusted too. I am in love with walking proof. His name is Allen- my love of 14 years...but that man can eat whatever he wants- he does not gain weight- okay let me be fair...he eats a large meal and his tummy will stick out about an inch and then he takes a shit and it goes away! LOL! No joke! He makes me sick! I swear our future children better have his metabolism dammit! Talk to you all later -hihi

Samantha. · 09-19-2009, 02:18 AM

I LOVE THINNER TIMES..

I've been going through this process for the last month and as some of you know I'm doing it in college while I live on campus in apartment style dorms(minus the kitchen). I'm lucky enough to have the support of the dining manager who is willing to order andything and everything I need to eat the right way pre and post op and plus I won't have to cook!

But I have been telling my closest group of friends 6 guys and 2 girls.
Both of the girls are size zeros but are doing their best to support me, they've been going to my support group meetings and such.

Three of the guys are amazingly supportive, one is in his 30's (a more rational thinker), one's grand father has it (he also knows allll my insecurities and reasoning) and one was previously heavy and is now a healthy weight and by himself he sticks to a diet like our post-op diet.

The three are in cahoots(spelling?!) they both haven't really seen me excersize and eat the best. They all think I don't "Need" the surgery and that if I excersize and eat right I will loose the weight. The worst part is that two of three are actually heavy nor do they eat right and only one of them goes to the gym.

They think it's the easy way out. Which is what pisses me off the most, they think I will fail and that I don't have the strength or stamina to do this (if I can't go to the gym now or eat smaller portions now why will I later. Like that makes me feel anybetter!) Their opinions won't change my mind, and I understand their thoughts and concerns but I refuse to allow them to tell me that it's the easy way out. They don't understand it's not the easy way out it's the only way out, and they don't understand that this is me saying "Hey World, I can't control my eating habits and if I keep on this road I will die".

I'd like to see them diet and excersize and loose 175 lbs. while fighting 3 slip and 2 bulging discs (somehwer around that number) and degenerative disc disease and before their family genes kick in and they get diabetes, high blood pressure and heart problems. Good luck to them I suppose.

Sorry for hijacking this thread-- was going to make one of my own but it's the same topic basically. So thanks! lol

With strangers or those who I don't know-- I don't plan on saying anything and if they ask what happened later on I have a feeling I'll have a new outlook and come up with the funniest answer ever.

For friends and family-- I just tell to support me through this or ask them what they want, so I can write it in my will for when I die. (Morbid, but true.)

Good luck, and keep me updated!

blevy · 09-19-2009, 01:11 PM

Atleast I know now that there are idiots all over the world and not just were I work!!! I don't give a flying fock about the negative crap people say to me about the surgery because if they had to live in my world for a second they'd be doing the same thing too!!!

Some people just SUCK!!!!

Okie Sunshine · 09-19-2009, 03:03 PM

I guess it's kind of like everyone else has said, people are idiots and they have no clue as to what it's like to walk in our shoes. I've heard too many people say condescending remarks about overweight people and wls so I choose to not tell most people I know. I told my best friend of 20 yrs, 1 co-worker who is also heavy and my family and am very blesses because they are all extremely supportive. Because of all my dr's appts, I told my boss that I was going to possibly have to have some surgery in the fall, that it was "personal" and I didn't really want anyone to know about it. Since he's a man, I figured that when he heard "personal" he would assume it was female related and not ask any questions

(he didn't, LOL)

So as for all the ignorant people who think they know everything just ignore them. I figure that in 20 yrs if we didn't do this we are the ones that would have to live with all the consequences that come with being super overweight, not them....So, we have to do what we feel is the best thing for us.....

Good luck on your surgery, I know it will go smoothly and I can't wait to join you on the losers bench

~Breanna

Laydeebugirl · 09-19-2009, 06:11 PM

I remember all the comments... I am six months post op.
Before surgery....
My son "Why don't you just get your ass up off the couch and exercise" (and he loves me).... he is my biggest fan today and has shook the hand of my doctors and said "Thank you so much for what you've done for my Mom"
My Mom ... long story short had to completely seperate myself from her for about four months so she could not sabatoge me in any way emotional or physical. Just had to do it. I know she must have felt hurt when I decided I would rather hobble around the house by myself right after the surgery then have her there with her negative comments and baking sugar cookies.....(i am serious) I just decided to do it on my own and am glad I did. The first time I dumped was at the hands of my mom's sugar cookies .... she "accidentally" left some at my house the first time I invited her over post-op.

DO WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO DO TO BE SUCCESSFUL . BE SELFISH!
FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE BE SELFISH!

I am so happy I had the surgery , have had zero complications physically.
I am down 70 pounds and from a size 24-26 to a size 14.
I would do it again in a hearbeat.
I am hiking and white water rafting and went out on my first date in five years a couple weeks ago.

DO WHATEVER IT TAKES........ to hell with other people I know this sounds harsh but most of us got fat pleasing other people or because we ate to suppress the emotions we felt about others. If we were angry we ate. If people hurt our feelings .... no problem cheesecakes solves that.....

One more time .... DO WHATEVER IT TAKES........
You wont regret it.

Good luck to all on this thread that are about to have surgery.