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JustJoy · 06-17-2009, 10:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jerseygrl684

I just feel like this piece of shit kid. I really do, and I don't think it is fair at all.

No it's not fair and you are NOT a piece of $hit kid. Don't let your mother's behavior determine your self-worth. *hugs*

UndercoverDiva · 06-17-2009, 10:43 AM

Jersey, I can tell you that your mom is so focused on your sister right now that she's not thinking straight. She doesn't realize what she's doing to you and, if things were right with your sister, this isn't something she would do. I agree with others who say you need to remove yourself from the situation. Take your BF's offer or the offer to go to Texas for a while. You need to take care of you! At some point, your mom will see the light and realize what she's doing, but you don't have to sit around there and wait for that day to come. I will pray that you have peace of mind soon.

bridgetgirl · 06-17-2009, 10:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jerseygrl684

I just feel like this piece of shit kid. I really do, and I don't think it is fair at all.

Sugar pea, I hate reading your story it makes me sad. I can relate somewhat to your pain.

If you are looking from kudos from your folks you are going to drive yourself crazy waiting for it. Trust me on this. Almost 2 years ago I was in an out patient psychiatric treatment program due to break down that I had. I learned alot about me, and the people in my life.

1. YOU; practice the 6 R's;

REST: know your limits, rest when you can
RELAXATION: excessive thinking isnt good, find books you enjoy or a class you can attend
RX: meds and vitamins
REFLECTION: Not asking why but look at; What is my role in life? How did I get here? How have have the choices I've made effected my life? What changes do I want to make?
REBUILDING YOUR LIFE: Small steps sugar pea
REJOICE: You are on your way
These 6 steps are posted in my home to remind me daily when I feel life spiriling out of control. They occur from MY choices, regardless of desperation or circumstance. Dont make excuses for it, own it and then rebuild your life.

2. Your parents did the best job they did, no matter how you feel about it. You have to accept the fact you arent going to get an apology, a hug, praise or any thing. I waited for it from my dad, I thought one day he would turn around and see Im a good kid and miss not being more active in my life. Its never going to happen because it's not in my dads personality or demeanor. I have to love him (if I choose to) knowing I cant change anything about him. When I accepted that my parents did the best and do the best they can it helped me. Regardless of how crappy pf a job it was, it molded me to be a better parent, friend and partner.

3. Ask your mom, how can I help? Maybe that could get a dialogue rolling. Maybe your job could be your sisters caregiver and you can draw income from that.

What I have shared with you has effectively reshaped my life, my thought processes and ho I handle stressful situations. Not many people know about my break down and my need for intensive Psych care. I hope what I have learned helps you too.

Love you sister!

j.marie · 06-17-2009, 11:24 AM

i can relate in a way to this situation, my mom is the same way, i get treated like yesterdays left overs. I am learning to let go of relationships that are pulling me down... its really difficult, its your MOM of all people!!! what a way to show your worth anything right? Not a fun place to be in, wish i had something totally awesome and F'n amazing to say but i dont since i am sinking in a similar situation!

jerseygrl684 · 06-17-2009, 12:34 PM

delete meeeeee

izanmanyzanz · 06-17-2009, 12:50 PM

sorry it is so bad for you right now. I wish I had some magic fairy pixie dust to make it all better for you. The household does sound toxic and I think you should apply for whatever assistance you can find. I know that here there are some apts that go by income so you might want to check in there, or call your local homeless shelters (well whenever the phone is found haha), tell them you are homeless. See if they can do anything to help you. Sending you hugs from Colorado.

Shetaz0028 · 06-17-2009, 01:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jerseygrl684

Yeah, i think this is about the time i email my dad. I need something... because this isnt cuttin it. This isnt where I need to be.... I cannot do this right now and if she thinks im going to clean up for the showing, she has a sad sad fckin hope and a prayer.

mom just called me and was like "did u read my email" -in this cunt-y tone... so i said.. no i havent. She's like where is my housephone? i'm like ask chrissy, i dont have it. Then shes like "your sisters nurse just called me from the car, she is afraid for your sisters health.. she feels she is in a toxic environment.. and is upset that she is home alone when she can barely walk".... im like. um, bish was all catty on the phone and doin her hair n makeup before... so idk where she "made a turn for the worst"..... she was just yelling and screaming like a freakin animal before... so i dont know where this sudden inability to walk came into place.

She's like YOU DONT BELONG HERE, WHAT DONT YOU GET?

Oh sweetie pie,

I really hope you know in your heart that you are an amazingly wonderful young woman with so much to offer. I wish I lived closer you'd have a place in a heart beat.

My thoughts and prayers are with you sweetie, if I can do anything just let me know. You have my number if you just want to vent.

Jeanie · 06-17-2009, 01:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jerseygrl684

Yeah, i think this is about the time i email my dad. I need something... because this isnt cuttin it. This isnt where I need to be.... I cannot do this right now and if she thinks im going to clean up for the showing, she has a sad sad fckin hope and a prayer.

mom just called me and was like "did u read my email" -in this cunt-y tone... so i said.. no i havent. She's like where is my housephone? i'm like ask chrissy, i dont have it. Then shes like "your sisters nurse just called me from the car, she is afraid for your sisters health.. she feels she is in a toxic environment.. and is upset that she is home alone when she can barely walk".... im like. um, bish was all catty on the phone and doin her hair n makeup before... so idk where she "made a turn for the worst"..... she was just yelling and screaming like a freakin animal before... so i dont know where this sudden inability to walk came into place.

She's like YOU DONT BELONG HERE, WHAT DONT YOU GET?

OK not to be rude but I think your Mom needs a slap with the reality stick!!! She can't see past anything but your sister being sick, and your sister knows that so she is playing the victim to your mom & your mom is falling in her trap. Letting her do this is not going to help her get better. You need to get out quick! If you are not eating anything or throwing up when you do you will become just as sick and NO ONE will believe you because they will think you need the attention.

Call your Dad ASAP! If you have to go sleep on the bf couch. This SUCKS that you have to go thru this. You are her daughter also, and all though you may not be sick you need your Mom's love.

SweetSouthern · 06-17-2009, 01:56 PM

You know how I feel honey. (((((((((((BIG HUGS))))))))))))) I love you bunches!

soon2bthin · 06-17-2009, 02:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jerseygrl684

Yeah, i think this is about the time i email my dad. I need something... because this isnt cuttin it. This isnt where I need to be.... I cannot do this right now and if she thinks im going to clean up for the showing, she has a sad sad fckin hope and a prayer.

mom just called me and was like "did u read my email" -in this cunt-y tone... so i said.. no i havent. She's like where is my housephone? i'm like ask chrissy, i dont have it. Then shes like "your sisters nurse just called me from the car, she is afraid for your sisters health.. she feels she is in a toxic environment.. and is upset that she is home alone when she can barely walk".... im like. um, bish was all catty on the phone and doin her hair n makeup before... so idk where she "made a turn for the worst"..... she was just yelling and screaming like a freakin animal before... so i dont know where this sudden inability to walk came into place.

She's like YOU DONT BELONG HERE, WHAT DONT YOU GET?

Sorry Kelly but I can't read anymore. The last sentence of this post would have totally sealed the deal for me. If I had to sleep in fockin car tonight I would not sleep another night in that "toxic environment".

I really just don't get how parents can make such a difference between their own flesh and blood. Granted different children need different raising, but I just don't get it. maybe since I am an only child who knows. This shit goes on in my husbands family daily, and it drives me bananas. How can a parent so "oh your the bastard kid" look out for your ownself.

I say go to the bf's house too if just temporarily until you can find a permanent fix.