My wife sucks - Page 2 - ThinnerTimes

Corrine · 04-22-2008, 10:35 AM

Scott - I'm lost for words.

I've heard about situations like that but never with a partner who's been through WLS as well. That's hard to fathom.

Maybe she is jealous that you're the center of attention now - could it be that you're stealing her thunder maybe?

Either way - you need to talk with her about this and sooner rather than later. And if you don't feel you could handle it face to face, maybe putting your feelings and thoughts down on paper for might be easier.

Persephone · 04-22-2008, 11:00 AM

Regarding your thread title.....Isn't that what one wants in a wife.??

I kid.

I'm sorry she's not supportive and there for you right now. That is what you need after surgery.

But I also understand needing space. Perhaps your wife is an Air sign?? I very much value my "alone time" and I seldom get it.

On the day of my birthday I woke up to find that D had scheduled a vacation day without telling me. I had envisioned a solitary day all to myself. I exploded in anger as I dressed to take Ash to school. He tried to explain that he just wanted to spend my birthday with me. I responded with something like yes MY Day I want to spend it my way and since it's MY day you get your ass up and take Ash to school. And I went back to bed. I did take my alone time. I had scehduled a hair appointment and then also went for a pedi and mani. I couldnt do it at home because he can't stand the smell of fingernail polish remover.

You mentioned that your wife also had surgery. How was her recovery? Perhaps she feels that she did not get the support she expected and is now reacting in kind. I know that I was prone to taking looong walks to speed my recovery but the majority of those walks took place when Dan was home. Some people just need space no matter how much they love you.

You guys should talk it out. Sounds like there is something more to her snapping at you. An underlying anger.

TracyGirl · 04-22-2008, 11:49 AM

I'm so sorry to read this. My surgery was the day after yours. My hubby is being kind of a stink head too. I know this surgery is hard on our families too. We can only hope things get better. Hang in there. It will also help when we're feeling better oursleves. I think when you don't feel well all other negative stuff just seems worse.

AlabamaChick · 04-23-2008, 07:10 AM

Wow, she DEFINITELY has issues! For crying out loud, you only just had major surgery and SHOULD BE AT HOME HEALING! This enrages me for some reason. I just don't understand why some people can act so ignorant and selfish. How can she expect you to leave the house for a few hours alone when you can barely even shower, get dressed, and walk without pain every step to get a glass of liquids you so desperately have to get down to stay hydrated. Tell HER to leave the house! I'm sorry I'm ranting, but I'd probably choke her if I were there for being so insensitive and uncaring to you. I can't stand someone that does not care about another one's feelings especially when they are under the weather or physically not able to do alot at the time. It's like kicking a lame dog in the head. Geeezz, just add to the misery why don't she? Sorry...rant over now. Scott, I really hope things get better for you. Remember to take care of YOU first and forget what SHE wants. You come first right now! Demand that in your own house. Good luck dear.

astona · 04-23-2008, 07:36 AM

WOW, I am totally shocked and so sad for you... Your wife should be loving and caring for you.

I am just speechless. you need to take care of you. Maybe you both should get some therapy or something. Doesnt sound healthy for you.

She has issues and needs to get over them. *HUG* I am sorry you are going thru this.

EmilyInVermont · 04-23-2008, 06:36 PM

Scott,

So sorry to hear your wife is being like that. I just don't understand her. I would never do that to Jim. He's here 24/7 as he works right here at home. I love having him around. Thirty-two out of our thirty-three years married we were parted most of the time because of work. I'm loving having him work here. He has his shop in the basement, so he's not under my feet all day, but that wouldn't matter either.

Talk to her and see what's going on in her head. Maybe she's worried about something. Communication is key to a good marriage. It's not always a smooth road, no matter how much you love each other.

I'm rooting for you both!

CiCi · 04-24-2008, 10:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by txchick1971

i'm so glad i'm not married.....

Same here, Trisha!!!

WAITING80 · 04-24-2008, 10:54 AM

Scott, she sounds like atough one. Just know that we are here supporting you although she is not. I know you would probably have the love and support of your wife but until she comes around, we're here.

Momof3 · 04-24-2008, 11:00 AM

momma said if you cant say anything nice....

so I'll bite my tongue.

best of luck scott, what a tough spot to be in....

*sigh*

spouses, cant live with 'em, cant bury 'em in the back yard....

coptergirl · 04-24-2008, 11:33 AM

and you can only fit one in the trunk of your car at a time...oh wait...I have an SUV...I think I can fit more if we fold them really nice-like

Quote:

Originally Posted by Momof3

momma said if you cant say anything nice....

so I'll bite my tongue.

best of luck scott, what a tough spot to be in....

*sigh*

spouses, cant live with 'em, cant bury 'em in the back yard....