Reality Check/ Rant - ThinnerTimes

desmccoy · 01-13-2008, 08:29 PM

As some of you know I have had complications with this surgery. But what you don't know is I have been putting on a pretty good front. In reality I have been sick to the point that even my color is looking bad. I vomit every day at least once if I attempted any thing other then fluids. I have lost weight so rapidly that my sugeon is concerned that I am in malnutrition state. Tonight I started throwing up again and it was so bad it came out my nose. Sometimes I think its just in my head but then reality sits in and I hear a little voice that says "you did this to Yourself". I have never once said I made a mistake or I regretted having this operation but believe me I am getting there. As is my husband. He doesn't even know what to do half the time. We can't go out because we never know if and when I'm going to be sick or I am to tired from not getting enough in or vomitting so much. Not to mention he has his own medicval issues right now. THIS IS SO TIRING!!!!!!! Thanks for letting me rant on and on. I hope things will evenyually get better.

Toony I know that you said you admire the faith I have in my God which I still do, In my family Which I still do But I don't think I have it in myself anymore.

Its such a struggle to get up in the morning knowing that at some point I am going to be kissing the porceline King. Its not fun.

jerseygrl684 · 01-13-2008, 08:35 PM

My sister went through this starting at 1 month out.. shes now had her PIC (sp?) line in for about a month... shes misreable.. i see it in her eyes.. she wonders "why me?" .. and trust me.. its as hard on the family as it is on you... espec since i had the surgery recently..

my hearts with you honey, it is.. because i see the struggle everyday w/ my sister.

good luck.

Claire-in-Texas · 01-13-2008, 08:36 PM

Oh, Desiree, dear one! I am so sorry to hear this.

You don't have to put on any fronts. Be YOU.

Do we know the reason why this is happening to you?

I hate that this is happening, and I hate especially to hear how it is affecting you emotionally. Heartbreaking....

Toony · 01-13-2008, 09:28 PM

Desiree... I'm glad you finally spoke out... I think you've been keeping this all inside too long! I can't imagine your pain and suffering and I worry about you... and your sweet hubby!!! He needs to care for his issues too...

What a tough time for you guys... I'm praying for you...

love,
Toony

Duckie · 01-13-2008, 10:10 PM

This is probably a stupid question but, has he scoped you to check for a stricture?
I'm sorry you aren't feeling well. {{{{{{{{{Des}}}}}}}

desmccoy · 01-14-2008, 04:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Duckie

This is probably a stupid question but, has he scoped you to check for a stricture?
I'm sorry you aren't feeling well. {{{{{{{{{Des}}}}}}}

Yes and during the scope he found an Ulcer. He is treating me for that. I have just been so STRESSED lately. It seems instaed of getting better I have a good day and think things are going well and then BAM all ges bad. I think I amy go back to 6 small very small meals a day. And see how that works for me. Its been rough.

VanessaSFL · 01-14-2008, 04:52 AM

Des, I am supposed to be Packing for San Francisco right now but when I have some time I will tell you a little about me.

I read your post and could have signed my name to it.Still could some days and I am on the cusps of 3 years out.Three out of four days a week I still can only tolerate liquids.I have adapted and accepted some things that "just are" and doing pretty good.All labs good except for Iron.

If you can only do liquids, do it, add unflavored protein powder, eat soups all three meals or for all six in my situation.

I too have had six strictures and multi ulcers,at times BOTH, BTW Ulcers are almost as bad as strictures more painful IMO.

Like I said, I lived/live every word you typed.

Gotta pack

Hang in there girl.

saraczek · 01-14-2008, 05:00 AM

Not sure if this will help but, I too went through the daily multiple vomitting sessions. This happened to me all the way through month 7 post-op. EVERYTHING made me violently ill. I was checked for strictures and other complications but nothing else was wrong for me. My surgeon just kept telling me to hang in there and do what I could to get enough fluids and as much protein in as I could keep down. Towards the last month of this crap it got so nasty that I started vomitting up blood because my throat was getting so raw from the continuous visits to the toilet. I kept the faith that it would get better as I had been told. Finally around month 8 the vomitting did slow done alot. I am now 14 months post-op and very rarely have any issues with vomitting. Maybe now about 1 or twice every week or two, and that's only because I ate too fast or too much.

I hope this gets better for you, I know it really sucks and gets very stressful. I'll keep you in my thoughts.

Duckie · 01-14-2008, 06:54 AM

I'm so sorry Des! I wish I could make you all better. Hang in there. (I know, easier said than done.) Keep seeing your surgeon and hopefully the two of you can figure things out. I agree with Van, stick to liquid proteins for now if you can and give that grouchy pouchy a break. Good luck hon.

Persephone · 01-14-2008, 02:33 PM

I'm so sorrry to hear this. I hope things get better soon for you.