Life is so freaking good... - Page 2 - ThinnerTimes - Gastric Bypass Forum, Lap Band Forum, and Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy Forum

Bigbaldbuddie · 02-08-2005, 12:58 AM

Wow!

To count how close to goal you are on your hands. Or better yet...to count down to goal on only 1 hand. There is just one word for that Babs:

Phenomenal!

I have no clue what a real goal should be for my self. Not the Metlife chart of 167. So I would still need more than all my apendages added togther to count how far away I'm from it.

But for you:

Seats upright...trays back..fasten your seatbelts..can you hear the landing gear coming down?

You are just about to reach the first waypoint of this whirlwind journey we started in different body, and what seems like such a different life some time ago.

Don't fret on possibly having a layover waiting for the next segment of your journey.

It's all part of our Itinerary.

a

Bigbaldbuddie · 02-08-2005, 01:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brutherford

Guys: Would you be put off if a girl told you, "So, I like you, why don't you ask me out?"

Absolutely NOT!

Myself, I would be not only flattered (and a we bit embarrased..but the good feeling kind, not the 'I wish I wasn't here right now' kind) but impressed by her courage and resolve.

I Think it is good for anyone to just come right out and to the point.

Life is too short to waste time! That's why we did this, right?

brutherford · 02-11-2005, 02:43 PM

Jeanie, Dara, Tonya, Kim, Bridget, and of course my BigBaldBuddie

I adore you - thank you so much for the honest feedback, incredible support, and the boosts to my ego! A huge part of my finally being able to accept some of these compliments is that I trust you all so much - I know that you would never tell me something that you didn't believe to be true, and if you believe it, it makes it a little easier for me to believe it too. Love you guys

I was in Santa Monica this week for training - it was a very bizarre experience. In my last job, I traveled 2-3 weeks out of the month all over the country and that experience was COMPLETELY different from this one, primarily because of my physical changes. Anyway, I journaled a bit and here's some of the differences:

It's pretty surreal to not be the fat person of the group when being in a new work situation - I was training with 60+ people from all over the country and it was one of the first times where I was put into a situation where no one knew my prior obese history. I was part of the crowd - I used to get all of these sideways glances that always made me feel like the stupid, lazy person I knew they assumed I was.
Being the "hot, single chick" is a VERY new phenomenon! Men would watch me (which makes me very uncomfortable) and women would turn their nose up to me (which makes me want to shake them and scream, "I'm a FAT CHICK!")
At first I was really confused by the fact that 3 of my study group partners (men) would not so subtly throw it into the conversation that they were married within the first 5 minutes. I asked a friend about it and she lauged and said, "that's how you know you're getting to them - they had to throw out the defensive maneuver early on." I told her that I was in no way flirting or hitting on them but she said it didn't matter - the defensive maneuver is for their sake, not mine.
The service staff were falling over themselves to help me - when I used to travel with work before, I would have to carry all of my own stuff because no one was offering to help. Now, they come running and constantly ask me what I need - it's hilarious.
Getting perks - my study group finally told me on the last day that I had gotten the best room of the conference by far... So, I guess the hotel manager WAS flirting with me...
Taking a bath - my bathroom was so awesome (and I had such a horrible cold) that I decided to take a bath. After I got in, I realized that I haven't taken a bath in close to a year - it was never my favorite thing to do because the tub was uncomfortable and the water never covered all of me. Sitting in that tub and realizing that I could now fit 3 of me in there was mindblowing.
When I offered a piece of chocolate to a study group member, they said, "Oh, you can eat those things because you're thin." WHAT?!
Being told "don't shake that boney finger at me!"
I was sitting at a table of entirely men for lunch and there were two empty chairs next to me - my friend said it was because the men wanted to avoid the appearance of impropriety. WHAT?!
Having a drink at the bar with one of my study group members and then the next morning being teased about our "date." At 327 lbs, I could have been in a hot tub with 10 men and no one would have assumed anything...
In the hotel spa was a massage chair - although it felt incredible, I was totally freaked out at how many bones the massager kept hitting.

Anyway - I'm exhausted and still have a nasty cold, but it was a great experience. Thank you again - can't wait to see you all next Thursday night!

Smooches, B

bridgetgirl · 02-11-2005, 03:40 PM

I feel you on SO many levels sister! Welocme home, its good to have you back. Your insight, wisdom and 2 cents were missed incredibly!

Jeanie · 02-11-2005, 07:09 PM

It sounds like you has an awesome time. I told you men were afraid of you, because you were to HOT for them...

Kelly · 02-11-2005, 07:21 PM

Wow Barbara! That is crazy how your experiences were totally different! It must have felt wonderful, but then a little disappointing. I can not stand hearing people around me talk about "fat" people. My husband was one of them for a while until I laid into him...Hello...your wife is FAT!!! But he never saw it that way. People on the outside do not see what an impact their words/reactions have on MO people. Thanks for sharing your story with us

Blueyz · 02-11-2005, 09:12 PM

I love your post and happy to see you are enjoying your new life. Can't wait to meet you at the meeting on the 17th.

Butterfly · 02-11-2005, 09:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brutherford

Yes, I could start asking guys out - I'm getting pretty close to that. However, the thing that's holding me back is the fact that I'm still getting used to the new me and I'm insecure. I'm afraid of rejection for every reason under the sun. It's actually working against me now with the guy thing - I've always made more male friends than female, and when I hang out with a male friend that I'm interested in and he doesn't make any moves I'm left with all the bad thoughts: "he doesn't like me because: I'm fat", "my face looks like Skeletor", "I wear glasses", "I have gray hair", "he can see the rolls of skin around my waist", blah blah blah...

Yes, I know it's ridiculous, but it's automatic.

Barb~ You silly girl! You are so beautiful! I know that it's hard to admit to yourself how darn good you look and get that self esteem up when it comes to guys. Everyone's afraid of rejection...not just with relationships, but they're not easy. You though, my friend, are extremely talented, beautiful, have a great sense of humor and you are just a complete KNOCK OUT, glasses or not. Don't let yourself down with negative thoughts. Stick your hand out for your wet noodle torture!

What are you most proud of that you did today?

Just remember that sometimes, you need to start off as friends first and then let the relationship bloom into something else...if it's meant to be, it's meant to be. You want to know each other first before getting involved in other complicated "stuff".

In closing, I just want you to remember that you have a great support group here that will not allow you to get down on yourself without feedback.

We love you Barb!!!