I've been very fortunate in that my husband and mother have been very supportive. I've not told my father yet, but he is likely to keep his opinion more or less to himself and will love me anyway. My kid's aunt had lapband done not long ago and visited her in the hospital. She is totally open about it with her family, and so it seems like not so much of a big deal to them. Just another thing adults do I guess.
As to my coworkers. I'm not sure. Those that 'hang out' with me during the day (not just in meetings, but so that we talk socially) certainly know about my nutritionist appointments and the diet changes and exercise I have been doing. As that will only continue (or get more extreme) after surgery, I don't know if it will be that much more noticable. I haven't decided if I will tell them or not.
I will need to tell my boss and HR, but both will be discrete. I have worked here 10 years without ever taking five consecutive days off, so I figure I'm due!
They have seen me yo-yo from 287lbs, 155lbs, 306lbs, 181lbs, 384lbs, and no one has ever said a word to me about my weight other than to congratulate me when they noticed it coming off. (Though I do remember telling someone who gave me the hairy eyeball as I ordered pasta that I'd given Atkins up after 13 months.)
I work in an environment with a lot of beautiful young men and women, many of whom have had plastics done (subtle and not-so-much). I'm sure some critics whisper behind their backs, but *shrug* I've always been the cheerleader for folks that take charge to do something that makes them happy. Sure beats hanging out with the folks that are bitter, sad and miserable all the time.
One guy dropped trou (at an off-site happy hour) to show us his surgeon's 'masterpiece'. There was all kinds of wrong in that, but it was too hysterically funny at the time for me (at least) to feel offended! And I honestly appreciated his candor. If it makes him happy, all power to him.
But telling folks I had intestinal surgery isn't a lie and is likely more than enough info for those not in my inner circle (but who ask) to handle. So I don't know yet how I will handle it.
I did talk to my priest about it (before I even told my husband I was thinking about it). He initially told me he needed to pray over the issue before he counseled me. When we talked later he told me that he believed that refusing the blessing that God offered was sinful. I worry about telling my church friends more than my coworkers. My coworkers are used to thinking off the wall, doing crazy things, reinventing themselves. My church friends seem to have a more hard line.
Still my church friends would be the first to offer support if I was having gallbladder surgery or my appendix removed. They would be the sort to come by and tidy up or make sure the lawn got mowed, bring by food for my family. Leaving them out seems wrong too. Would they be less supportive if they considered the surgery elective? I honestly don't know and am a little afraid to find out.
Ugh. I'm conflicted. But it is in my nature to be open and honest and expressive regardless, so I probably will. It wouldn't be the first time people knew more about me than they likely wished too. haha.
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