My husband is too stubborn to help himself - ThinnerTimes - Gastric Bypass Forum, Lap Band Forum, and Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy Forum

Liddo · 08-17-2009, 09:58 PM

My husband had the Gastric Bypass surgery 8-9 years ago. Apparently after a bad relationship he had started to gain the weight he lost back. Now that we have our second child on the way he is becoming worried about his health. But apparently not enough to take charge.

Since I was not with him during his surgery and know little about it I was wondering if I could get some info. How much should he be eatting? He gets sick all the time after he eats and I'm very worried. I only recently found out from the mayo clinic site that it is from eatting too much or too fast. I want to make sure we are all eatting properly, since our son has just started eatting with us(just turned one).

Is there anything he definately should and shouldn't be eatting? Anything I definately need to know about this type of life altering surgery? He knows I want to help him but for some reason won't tell me these things. Any info would be great. The most I seem to find is for right after surgery.

poet_kelly · 08-17-2009, 10:36 PM

He needs to be eating at least 60 grams of protein a day, and drinking at least 64 ounces of fluid a day. He needs to be taking vitamins every day, preferably vitamins specifically designed for weight loss surgery patients. Other vitamins don't have enough of what we need. He needs multi-vitamins, calcium, and vitamin B12. The vitamins are VERY important because after a gastric bypass, we don't absorb nutrients as well any more. Very serious complications can result from not taking vitamins. Has he had any blood work done lately? He needs to get blood work done every year to check for any vitamin deficiencies.

Basically at meals, he needs to eat protein first, fruits and vegetables second, and carbs last. He should not be eating a lot of carbs. Some people can't tolerate sugar or very fatty foods after a gastric bypass, but others can. Still, even if he can eat these things, he shouldn't be eating them often. I'm not sure how much food one should be able to eat at one time that far out. Maybe a cup? It will depend a little on what type of food it is, though. Like, I can eat a lot more soup than I can eat rice or chili. The more liquidy the food, the more he'll be able to eat.

He needs to eat slow and he needs to chew his food really, really well. Eating too fast or not chewing well can cause him to get sick to his stomach. So can eating too much at one time. But if he's frequently getting sick after eating, he should probably talk to his doctor. That's not normal.

Another thing is that he should not be drinking with meals. He should not drink for about 30 minutes before or after meals, either. That's important for gastric bypass patients.

I think it's great that you want to learn and help him, and I hope you find a lot of good information and support here on TT. But you should also know that he's an adult and he has to take responsibility for himself. You can help him, but you can't do it for him or make him do what he should do. I'm sorry he doesn't want to talk to you about the surgery. I think most of us here would love for our partners to want to learn so much.

Kelly

Liddo · 08-17-2009, 10:52 PM

Thanks. I realize he is an adult but I think if I take over making our meals and making them as nutrious as possible it will help him not make bad choices. Yes he could sneak out and get McDonalds but it isn't likely. I've gotten him to eat a little better (not the stuff you were saying he needed though). And he hasn't gone behind my back yet.
When his new insurance starts working(starts his new job mon) I'll make sure to remind him he is a few years behind on these blood tests. Can the vitamins for weight loss ppl be found everywhere cause I think he just has random chewables.
But thanks again. I'll be sure to incorporate what he needs into what we all eat.

poet_kelly · 08-17-2009, 11:05 PM

Regular chewable vitamins probably don't have enough of the stuff he needs. For people who've had a gastric bypass, we need 200% of the recommended daily allowance of vitamins. There is a thread on this site comparing a bunch of different vitamins. I'll see if I can find it for you. The best ones are going to be ones specifically made for weight loss surgery patients. Two good brands are Celebrate and Bariatric Advantage. I'm pretty sure you can buy Bariatric Advantage at some stores, and you can also order them online. I think you have to order the Celebrate online. Celebrate will send you free samples if you email them and ask, and I think Bariatric Advantage will too, if he wants to try them before he orders. I can't stress the importance of the vitamins enough. Really serious problems occur when people don't get their vitamins.

While I'm going on about vitamins, he needs to be taking calcium. Very important. And it needs to be calcium citrate, not calcium carbonate. We don't absorb the calcium carbonate very well. Some doctors just tell patients to take a couple of Tums a day for the calcium, and that is very BAD advice, because it's calcium carbonate.

There are a bunch of recipes under the Gastric Bypass Nutrition section of TT. You might want to check them out. You might some good ideas of things to cook. Of course they're all suitable for gastric bypass patients, but most of them are good for the whole family. I've gotten a lot of recipes from here and my partner loves what I make for dinner.

Kelly

poet_kelly · 08-17-2009, 11:07 PM

Here's the thread about the different vitamins.

Flintstones vs. Bariatric Vitamins

Kelly