Wow thats a great question. So much has changed in 1 1/2 years yet some things havent.
Emotionally-I am so much better. My depression (mostly self-esteem issue) is 95 % better. I am happier with what I see looking back at me from the mirror. I smile more. I am less afraid of being out and being seen. I am more confident in the person I am.
Professionally-I like my job still but now the reasons I used to love my job dont hold true anymore. I would like one with more public contact. I want to see and talk to people where as before it was perfect cause I saw no one and my only contact was via telephone.
Spiritually-I think that has improved. In trying to improve my health both mental and physical I have begun seeking some spiritual guidance and redicovering my faith.
Socially-thats where the problem lies for me. Dating is difficult for me. Having been overweight my whole life I think I failed to learn certain "dating" skills that a lot of young women learn as they grow up. Also, being the fat girl in a pre-teen, teen and post teen dating situations I had and still have a deep mistrust of men. I am working on this but old habits are hard to break. I can say that I have met one or two that have proven that not all men are liars, out to get laid and can see beyond your boobs.
The things that havent changed for me are my values. Somethings still hold true for me and now as a person with a little more confidence I realize that I dont have to settle or compromise what I feel strongly about.
Friends- I have lost a few due to jelousy or fear I dont know. I have a few tried and true who have always been there. On this all I can say is if they are willing to walk away and not be supportive of any attempt to improve yourself, let them go.
Family-my family does treat me different now, but then I treat them different. I have a voice and an opinion and I speak my mind when I have something to say. My mother was the biggest supportor of this surgery while my sister was against it. My sister eventually came around and is now one of my biggest supporters. She sees the change in me not just the physical one.
Bottom line.....the decision to have the surgery was one of the best decisions I have made in my whole life. The good the bad the emotional ups and downs if I had to do it over I would be right there in line again.
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Debbie
11/15/04 Lap
Dr. Callery
321/158/140 BMI 23.5
171lbs gone for?? working on FOREVER!!
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