I really couldnt agree more with the other posters.
I'm 5 days out of my op - and on days 1 and 2 I regretted it a lot, I wish I hadnt made the change in my life. But why?
Let me look at the two paths my life was taking
1. Not having the operation.
I was finding that I spent less time with my friends, was gaining more weight and now binge eating every day. I was paying nearly 40% more for clothes in my size, and was even growing out of them. I was spending around $350 a month just in binge foods like a pizza, curry etc when I really shoudln't.
Losing contact with friends really wasn't great, but I just didnt have the energy to go out with them. I fealt so low about my size that harming myself at one point became a real possibilty
I wasn't upset, I fealt numb, even being around my parte I had lost all sexual drive. I didnt hate myself or others around me, I just "nothinged" everyone.
2. Post op
Currently the reality is that I am a touch unconfrtable, and yes, I dont get to binge on all those foods I love. Thing is though I have hope. I had a cry the other day, im 26 now and it's something I havent done since my 16th birthday. It fealt rather good really, it was joy, and having an emotion inside me was something new, as realistically I hadn't had positive emotion in me for some time.
I'm losing weight quicker than I can count, and now after this short while wearing clothes I stopped getting into about 2 years ago. Even though I'm still big, and will be for some (short) while, i'm getting a little more confident.
I will soon be out of the risk area for heart attack, diabetes and basically early adult death.
I will be able to wear nice designer clothes, or at least clothes from a normal shop without having to look for xxxl etc. I will be able to walk to the shops without being out of breath
I will be able to feel like a sexual being without havign to try hide myself.
I will be able to dance like nobody else dances until 4, 5, 6AM, like I used to.
Now dont get me wrong cherypita, I'm not preaching to you. However.
I'd like you to tell me, have I made the right decision?
without wax
Adam x
__________________
New to TT - but ready to go.
01/07/09 353.8
30/06/09 358.2
01/08/09 314
24/10/09 CURRENT 285
Pre-op 367.5
Goal 190
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