Thread: Not eating..
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Old 07-08-2008, 08:00 AM   #23 (permalink)
Marella
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Pennsylvania
Age: 50
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Josephine View Post
If you're not thinking about what got you there to begin with, if you're not discussing it, picking it apart, or talking to someone about it all as you lose the weight, you're doing yourself a grave disservice. Again, just my opinion.
I agree with your opinion. It was more than food that got me to this position and I have done a lot of self-discovery over the last few years. And of course, self-pity was the biggest weight gainer.

So for me, I'm tired of self-pity. I have to learn to recognize when I'm in that state and do something immediately to get out of it... and NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, blame someone else for my own solo pity party.

That being said, as I gained and gained, self-pity increased and increased because I could do less and less. Fibromyalgia took over completely because I submitted to it. What a wallflower!

That being said, I took the bull by the horns (finally!) and decided that self-pity will only win if I don't lose. I took control of my pain management in a daily routine and looked forward to the surgery that would change my life. Meanwhile I did whatever I could to not be sedentary.

Yep, that self-pity monster still seems to be there every now and again, but at least I know that I and I alone have the power to banish. And when the body pain gets to me, I've just been pushing it aside and persisting with it - staying in bed is not an option. In order for me to have a good life, sometimes there are things that I just have to live with, but I will endeavor to change those things that I have the power to change. I want to WIN.

Just a note on pain meds: I've been on Oxycontin for about 2 weeks now for my hernia pain. Wow, that's strong stuff. I take only at night so that I can sleep otherwise the pain wakes me constantly. My first night I was so dizzy and nauseous for the entire night and the next day. The second night I took half a pill, as well as the next three nights and the Oxy halfves did their job. Suddenly, that half a pill didn't do what it was doing. I took a whole Oxy. After 4 days of use, that dizziness and nausea vanished. Yep, I got used to the pill, and so did my body. I'm terrified of narcotics, even legal ones. Last night I slept w/o an Oxy, just to try it. I slept 6 hours instead of 10, but I slept. Now I'm going to see of the pain level is as high as it was before I started with these meds.

As for not eating on narcotics... yep, my appetite has been cut drastically, but my weight loss is still nominal. I have to force myself to eat.
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~ Marella


Day 77: TTwo-terville - 53 lbs down
Day 188: Century Club - 100 lbs down
Day 366: 1 Year - 146 lbs down
Day 396: One-derland - 153 lbs gone forever! (my pic progression)


Starting BMI: 60.4 / Current BMI: 33.6

Nearly 16 TEN pound bowling balls down... OMG, let me pinch myself!

I don't want to know how much I have left to lose -- I find it encouraging to see how far I've come!

Last edited by Marella; 07-08-2008 at 08:08 AM..
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