Could you do a written plan so that you don't have to work with her directly? Maybe something where she can see that every couple of workouts you are slowly increasing/pushing her limits but that would also show her results in a certain amount of time?
People like this (and I've been in this boat myself...) often respond like children would when moving from unstructured behaviors to structured ones. The thing that she's not understanding is the reward at the other end. For some people (and kids) it's all about the reward, and her reward may not be necessarily framed by health/fitness. She's too in the moment, and the structure that you are providing by working with her is too confining for where she feels she's at. In order for her to break out of that, and be a little more open and comfortable with her situation, she needs smaller goals, and positive reinforcements/rewards along the way. (Which technically she should set up for herself. If you do it, then she has no vested interest to try on her own.)
Maybe ask her what she feels she should be working toward besides the weight goal and remind her that when you ask her to do something that she feels she isn't ready for, that you wouldn't ask if you thought she would be unable to complete it. Remind her that your advice is to help, not hinder, her efforts, but ultimately, she has to make the decision to do what needs to be done. If she can't do that, or can't come up with some sort of positive reinforcement for herself, within your structural frame of knowledge, then it may be time for a little distance.
What all of this boils down to is giving her something concrete (a written plan) where she has factored in positive reinforcement that will matter to her and for her to understand what your role is, and what it is not, so that she can become more intrinsically motivated. Otherwise, everything you do will be undone when she is working this on her own.
I hope this wasn't too wordy...I have that tendency...
Good Luck!
-Mike
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FISHERBEAR MIKE
402/232/under 200 (As of 06/23/08)
Highest/Current/Goal
Open RNY - September 24th
170 pounds GONE, BABY, GONE!
BMI: 63 (was) / 35.8 (is)
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