Quote:
Originally Posted by jerseygrl684
I'm not going to sugarcoat and be like 'ohhh its okay' or 'omg ur surgeon is soooo mean' because it is NOT okay and you surgeon knows more than we all do combined. Maybe there is something further going on that you and your doctor need to discuss.. but at 27, with no KNOWN medical history... theres no excuse for a 15 lbs GAIN...
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Blunt and honest is okay. I think honesty is what people come here seeking, as well as support and understanding. The thing we need to be careful of is the tone in which things are said. Since we are online, it's very difficult to gauge someone's tone and still receive what's said in the spirit in which it was offered. Sometimes on Thinner Times responses, the tone comes across as judgmental, when it may not have been meant to be that way.
When someone asks for help and understanding, I think it's fair to be honest, but I also think it's fair to be kind with our words and know that there are many compassionate ways to say things and still be honest and blunt. We are all here for the same reasons and we are all here because we need something beyond the surgery experience. That thing we need is camaraderie, and knowing that others have been there, and knowing how they dealt with the situations that arise.
Many of us are on the loser's bench, but we were once where the pre-oppers are now. While I agree that things should not be sugarcoated when we relate our own experiences, a little empathy and consideration go a long way.
-Mike