Amanda - Do you that I was thinking of you just the other day?! I am so glad you are back with us, hon...you have been missed.
Know what? Life doles out the shits sometimes, and it sounds like 2007 was just as hard for you as it was for me. Know what? Life can also be healing, and it seems as if you have taken so many important steps into the positive healing of YOU. Now is the time to become friends with Amanda and know what her likes and dislikes are in life, to learn about the types of folks you want to be with - both friends and otherwise. Sounds also like a great time to reconnect with your family since Alex seems to not have had a lot to do with family things since he didn't "do holidays" (thats something I knew about him, and always thought strange). This is an adventure in rediscovering YOU. I am really sorry you have had to go through so much this year - doesn't seem like it when you're in the midst of it, in respect to Alex, it sounds as if he was "getting the milk for free" so to speak in not making a commitment to you. I am proud of you sticking up for yourself and sticking to your guns. You have also been through tons with a major job change. Wowzers - what gumption you have, love. I hope you see it as that and are proud of the changes you have made. Scarey? Hell yes!! I am telling you from experience that as you look back, you will see that bigger doors will open for you in your life since this window was shut.
Not sure if you still have my number or not, but you are welcome to call me (I am in Colorado right now with my mom, so reception is bad if at all...will be home Monday night), or PM me for my number and we can chat. I am no longer in Cali, though - I am in Western New York...yep changes have occurred in my world too
I am glad you came back to us, love - we are here for you in any way that we can help!