NYNMD

I've been a secret member of this site for some time. Lurking and seeing some of the same emotions that I'm going through.

Sitting hear late at night, because my GERD won't let me sleep. Had dinner quite late and laid down afterwards. Choking in the middle of the night and now I can't get rid of that feeling in your mouth after fluids back up in your throat. (sorry for the gross description). My feeling of fullness, when I might have eaten dinner 4-5 hours ago. Ankles hurting and the feeling that you never get enough sleep. Is it sleep apnea, which I have or am I depressed and will never get a good night sleep again. Even after the surgery.

The surgery - is that some abstract ray of sunshine or do my heart and mind need the operation first. I wonder everyday, am I making my symptoms worst, by putting so much faith into an operation? Am I unhappy about life period? Don't know the answers.

Kim - 5'2, 250 lbs. Waiting for approval. Psych and sleep study done.
Wife/Mother of 17 year old/38 years young.

Can I eat the way my nutritionist would like for me to eat after the surgery for the rest of my life. Liquid diets, soft mushy foods, feeling like an outcast or healthier body, longer life, smaller clothes, and putting an end to this food obsession. Sounds easy! The answer is right in front of me.

I'm tired. Tired of walking up stairs and taking 5-6 min to catch my breath. Tired of lacing my shoes up at an angle. Tired of purchasing 22's. Tired of wearing sneakers all the time. Tired of stretch elastic jeans. I'm damn tired of it all.......