Lisa, even though I'm not where you are yet I do get what you are saying. I've thought about this alot pre-plastics. I found myself in quite a bit of emotional turmoil before my plastics surgery. I think a lot of it revolved around the feeling that this was kind of the "end" for me. I don't expect to get any more plastics (though I will never say never) but I feel this surgery will be eventually bringing me down to my goal and when I started looking into plastic surgery what I was able to have done was my ultimate goal. I think my turmoil revolved around the feelings of "now what?".
You know the past 20 months have been such a roller coaster for both of us and in some ways there was a thrill to that...the thrill of change. I remember Dyann asking almost this exact question when she reached "goal"....now what do I do?
I think now is the time that we re-learn what is important to us in our lives. It is the time that we now work on finding out how to be happy within ourselves and to feel comfortable within ourselves. Yes, things have changed for many of us....some things for the better, others have been thrown into emotional upheaval.
You know this surgery basically just puts us on a level playing field with others in the world. You know we aren't the only ones who have these struggles, who fear the gaining of weight, who have to learn what it is we want in our lives. My 25 year old daughter goes through many of those struggles too and believe me she has never known the pain of obesity.
For the past 20 months you and I have worked mostly on the physical side of our lives...its been hard and challenging work, now its time for you and me to be working on learning how to live as a "normal" person does, with all of their struggles, challenges and fears....
.....its called "living" Lisa, and that is the exact reason I took the step I did 20 months ago today...so I could learn to live.
Happy 20th podmate!!
__________________
Beth
Little Victories; Grand Rapids, MI
Bariatric Support Group
CherishedTeddyBear-(TT Bear Lover)
The Poetry of Milady
New Beginnings: My Journey to LIFE
359(BMI:
57.9)/
143(BMI:
23.1)
Highest/Current
Diabetes, high blood pressure, sleep apnea, high cholesterol,
peripheral vein disease, joint pain and 216 lbs
GONE!!
Century Club: July 3, 2006
ONE-derland: Dec. 22, 2006
Double Century: May 29, 2007
Goal: June 15, 2008
Lap RNY: 1/30/06-Dr Randal Baker
TT/BL: 09/21/07-Dr Ronald Ford
PS Revisions: 04/29/08-Dr Ronald Ford
Gallbadder removal: 06/09/08-Dr Randal Baker
"...if we pay attention to the fact that we can move,
breathe, feel, laugh, cry and notice sunsets,
there is cause for joy."
-Geneen Roth
