I think you are a very loving and accommodating wife and devoted mother. It doesn't seem to matter what kind of sacrifices you make to placate your household and allow them to be on their own for 2 stinkin' hours a month that help you maintain your self esteem and emotional health. I think that's pretty selfish on the part of those perpetrating the guilt trips. Nancy, you are eating because you KNOW this is not right, and you are not happy, and food soothes. I think you have to dig deeper than "you are choosing to eat bad foods." Love yourself the way you would a dear friend, Nancy. Wouldn't you tell a friend the same advice if she came to you with the same issues?
And Nancy, it's NOT just once a month for support group. You have not attended in 4 months if we count next week when you said you can't come. You also haven't been on the forum in months. That's significant and very passive aggressive in its attempt to sabotage your dreams and goals. I wish you felt safe enough to put your foot down and say that there are 720 hours in a month, and by God, 2 of them WILL BE for me!
Ain't Mama happy, ain't no one happy! I don't doubt your boys are having trouble, they see how unhappy you are, the reasons for it, and they begin to feel insecure as well. I betcha if you were allowed to come back to group the tension level of the household would drop. If not everyone embraces that idea, then you are forced to assume that those people want you to fail and get back to your old (fat, low self esteem, manipulatable) self.
Why don't you give me a call, Sweetheart? I've got time to talk now that the cats are the only ones I talk to. I'm hurting for you, SisterWoman, and I encourage you to take 1 step every day to assert your worth and demand your due. You deserve nothing less.
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Donna the SDgrrl 
Happy to be a GrrzlyBear!
doing the best I can each day
Honor yourself, honor others, and honor the Earth...the rest will take care of itself
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